Depersonalization

I have been dissociating on a daily basis at a very early age. I would get depersonalised, meaning that I would feel like I am floating and observing myself in a third-person perspective, walking elsewhere. It feels like an out-of-body experience, where I would be completely disconnected from my emotions, feelings and physical surroundings, becoming completely unplugged.

It could just happen at anywhere and at anytime. It feels like the moment I am depersonalised, that I am not existing at all. This type of dissociation could happen to even with people without trauma, such as being caught up watching television, however, when the frequency of depersonalisation happens on a daily basis, it becomes a disorder in one’s life. I would depersonalise myself in the classroom, in the train, at home and it is a coping mechanism, for those who are traumatised, because dissociation is meant to be served as a way to buffer from feelings that are otherwise too unbearable.