Trauma & Abuse

On this page, I am going to share about what is Complex Trauma (C-PTSD) and what I have personally been through with this psychiatric condition. Complex Trauma is also known as Developmental Trauma. There is difference between Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, which PTSD is a psychiatric disorder caused by a singular traumatic event and C-PTSD is a disorder caused by multiple types of trauma, in a prolonged period of time repetitively.

I will share briefly of what I have been through and will expand it in details when I write posts that will be featured on the homepage. First of all, my first type of trauma is early childhood neglect. I was neglected by my caregiver from the age of four to seven, when my parents were out to work. At the same time, when I was four years of age, I also have experienced child sexual abuse, which is the second type of trauma. At the age of eight, I was separated from my father, which is the third type of trauma. The year before this when I was seven, the fourth type of trauma has started, which was the trauma of bullying.

I have been bullied relentlessly all throughout primary to high school and beyond, even as a university student. I have always been the target of bullies in my defenceless nature. The minor sexual assaults occurred at the age of nine, ten, twelve, twice in sixteen, twice when I was twenty-one and twenty-two. The serious sexual assaults occurred at the age of thirteen twice and twenty. Sexual perpetrators who targeted me for abuse was when I was aged thirteen by two men and twenty.

The fifth type of trauma was domestic violence, which occurred when I was thirteen and twenty-one. The sixth type of trauma, which some may not understand is frequent displacements of homes, schools and countries. In average, my family would have two years per house moving, two years per school changing and four years per country resettlement. As a consequence, I have lost my sense of belonging completely, due to the all-too-frequent new adaptations.

In conclusion, I have experienced six types of trauma from early childhood up to adulthood, which I have chronically suffered. I am now, at the age of twenty-two, am extremely traumatised, with the recalling of early childhood neglect, family separation, bullying, sexual abuse, domestic violence and frequent displacements. In my experience, psychological wound is worse than physical wound, because physical wounds can often be mended within a set time, but with psychological wounds, the pain can be triggered by traumatic memories over and over again.